Disclaimer: all claims made in this article are fictional.
As is the yearly tradition, the senior class has come up with two class holiday wishes for the year 2021. And, as is the yearly tradition, the first wish is world peace. We have to maintain some sense of normalcy this year.
The second wish is where more thought and difficult decision-making are required. This year’s senior class wish is for bamboo to be re-classified as wood instead of grass. Personally, this distinction has troubled me a lot recently. I find it deeply concerning that my WOODEN spatula is made out of grass.
I hear the counterarguments brewing already. Yes, I understand that bamboo looks vaguely different from other trees. However, I would like to argue that bamboo is equally as distant from grass as any other tree. It’s time to clear up this mess once and for all. In the midst of the chaos and suffering of this year, the least they can do is make bamboo a wood.
Thank you Holiday Spirits for considering this humble proposal. Also, to reiterate, world peace would be incredible while you're granting wishes.
As is the yearly tradition, the senior class has come up with two class holiday wishes for the year 2021. And, as is the yearly tradition, the first wish is world peace. We have to maintain some sense of normalcy this year.
The second wish is where more thought and difficult decision-making are required. This year’s senior class wish is for bamboo to be re-classified as wood instead of grass. Personally, this distinction has troubled me a lot recently. I find it deeply concerning that my WOODEN spatula is made out of grass.
I hear the counterarguments brewing already. Yes, I understand that bamboo looks vaguely different from other trees. However, I would like to argue that bamboo is equally as distant from grass as any other tree. It’s time to clear up this mess once and for all. In the midst of the chaos and suffering of this year, the least they can do is make bamboo a wood.
Thank you Holiday Spirits for considering this humble proposal. Also, to reiterate, world peace would be incredible while you're granting wishes.