Buzzfeed recently published an article that got a lot of hate because it fed into stereotypes about the LGBTQIA+ community and didn't have very much multidimensionality to it. The article was called "99 Things Straight People Probably Don't Know Are Gay." Sorry to break it to you, Buzzfeed, but everyone, even straight people, knows astrology and iced coffee are gay. So, we decided to make a new list. Without further ado, here’s Thursday Detention’s parody: a list of 99 things straight people actually don’t know are gay (written by some queer members of the TD staff).
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  1. Frozen 2
  2. Any Disney movie
  3. Okra
  4. The green trash can
  5. Marsupials
  6. The smell of vanilla
  7. Insomnia
  8. Bachelor Nation
  9. Using military time
  10. Using dark mode
  11. Art
  12. Architecture
  13. Music
  14. The House of Representatives
  15. Chick-Fil-A
  16. Indoor plants
  17. The word gossamer
  18. Four-weel drive
  19. Wearing anything on your head
  20. The PAC lobby
  21. The technology section of Target
  22. Pastel-colored Volvos
  23. Dolly Parton music
  24. Composting
  25. Burning things
  26. Running a psychic hotline 
  27. Brokeback Mountain
  28. The iPhone 11
  29. Hide-A-Key
  30. Reading
  31. Groovy Girls
  32. Zip Zap Zop
  33. Beans
  34. The color orange
  35. The color fuschia
  36. Cardigans
  37. Flavored milk
  38. Doc Marten platform sandals
  39. “Uptown Girl”
  40. Fruit
  41. Picnics
  42. Big dogs
  43. Axe Body Spray
  44. Ankle socks
  45. Birds of paradise
  46. The brick emoji
  47. Watching Stephen Colbert
  48. Pinterest
  49. Kant
  50. Sitting close to the mic in Town Hall
  51. Non-peanut nut butter
  52. Changing friend’s contact names to something that isn’t their name
  53. The leg emoji
  54. Having a lunch box
  55. Using string instead of belts
  56. Ending a text conversation with a Tapback
  57. Airbnb hosts
  58. Chronic back pain
  59. Playing viola
  60. Car washes
  61. “Come on Eileen”
  62. Parkour
  63. Ginger ale
  64. The rule of law
  65. Wired Apple earbuds
  66. AirPods
  67. Rocks
  68. Martinis
  69. Apple CarPlay
  70. Saying random things that you think out loud
  71. Gossip Girl
  72. Weighted blankets
  73. Listerine Cool Mint Pocketpaks Breath Strips
  74. Dinosaurs
  75. Hotel chains
  76. Magazines
  77. French music composers
  78. Using a seatbelt
  79. Taylor Swift
  80. Fear of confrontation
  81. Putting clothing on pets
  82. Buying a house with an attic
  83. Reading the NYT as your only news source
  84. Making lists
  85. Saying “ne-vah-da” instead of “Nevada”
  86. Belgium
  87. Being really early to important meetings
  88. Shivering
  89. Using fabric softener on jeans
  90. Venn diagrams
  91. Walking
  92. Nebraska
  93. Clark’s Nutrition & Natural Foods Market
  94. Pumpkin cream cold brew
  95. Velcro
  96. Bad tie-dye
  97. IKEA
  98. Cruise control
  99. Kissing girls
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