​It’s November 1st and Mariah Carey is already promoting her hit single “All I Want for Christmas Is You” as if it hasn’t been streamed over 900 million times (true fact by the way). If that isn’t the definition of self-preservation and capitalism, I don’t know what is. Why not stream Mistletoe by Justin Bieber? Who doesn’t want to hear a prepubescent boy sing about his love life?! I know I do!! Also, NEWS FLASH Mariah, I know I’m not all you want for Christmas. I don’t even know you! So don’t you dare lie to me. I have to call you out on the lyrics: “ I don't care about the presents underneath the Christmas tree.” While this may be true, it is only true because why else would you care about the presents under the tree when you have over 900 million streams?? Imagine the royalties!! This may seem like a very angry approach to a festive, joyful song and maybe I am just jealous I don’t have a top song on Billboard but why should we fill our ears with lies??? Mariah does not want you, she wants more royalties so I urge you this year to listen to one of the many other holiday songs that exist in this strange world of ours.  
  
All I Want for Christmas is Truth, 
  
Bean