After the publication of boy racer’s article Don't Read This Article if You Are Under the Age of 17, Thursday Detention LLC found themselves in hot water with the Westridge Honor Council, as that article broke several community guidelines. However, we used this as an opportunity to allow our top investigative journalist, budderball, to learn more about the Council’s mysterious “restorative practices”. Read below to find out what really goes down in Honor Council!


My watch reads 1:16 as I walk into a classroom at a location I am not at liberty to specify. I am set to face the Honor Council on behalf of boy racer as they were not able to decode our incredibly secretive and secure pseudonyms. Approximately 2 minutes later at 1:18pm, Honor Council strolls in with the Chipotle they catered in! So that’s where all our DEIJ budget is going, extra guac for the Honor Council! Unbelievable. However, they did offer me a chicken bowl, so I can’t be too mad at them. They then asked me to give my testimony. I presented my case, that boy racer’s article was justifiably written due to our First Amendment right to freedom of the press. After not being able to provide a valid rebuttal, they moved into the next stage of their meeting, “restorative practices.” Apparently, the Honor Council wants to restore Westridge to pre-Thursday Detention times, due to our controversial nature. But never will Thursday Detention be shut down! Actual student-led journalism is too valuable to the Westridge community to be censored! Eventually, I was able to strike a deal with the honor council. In order to restore peace in the Westridge community, Thursday Detention will increase its use of ChatGPT by 100% when writing its articles. (Our writers don’t do anything anyways.)

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